10 Things You Should Never Say To A British Person

british person rules

My name is Amy and I am British. Those are the only two things people need to know before we proceed to quickly become best of friends—well, that’s if I’m in America, anyway, and it tends to be the latter of these two key facts that gets people really interested.

I’m going to just say it to you straight-up: I love America and I love Americans. Never in my life have I been so overwhelmingly liked by perfect strangers, simply because I have an accent. And yes: I admit that I’m a sucker for attention, so being at the centre of it gave me every reason to look favourably on you Yanks and the New World that you inhabit (that, and the life-altering phenomenon that is free soft-drink refills).

You see, I lived in Pennsylvania for a little less than a year for study-abroad. After living in the U.S. for a while, though, I must admit I got a little tired of meeting new faces. Not because I didn’t like the people I met, but because when you’re an awkward little British kid in a sea of Anglophiles, people like to ask questions. Lots of questions. And they ask the same questions again and again and again. I love you guys, but having to face the same comments day after day definitely grates on a poor homesick soul a little bit.

So, with that in mind, I thought I’d try and do y’all a favour—that is, compile a list of things that you should probably try not to say to a British person. That cute British guy in your class, for example—or, y’know, Prince Harry if you should ever casually run into Britain’s most eligible bachelor while he’s still single*.

1. “I love British accents!”

I’ll begin with my biggest bugbear. Let me just give a quick geography lesson here. Great Britain (or, rather, the United Kingdom) is made up of four countries: England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland. All of these countries have very distinct national characteristics and very different accents. Within these countries there are even further variances in accent. Like, huge variances. A person from Glasgow will sound absolutely nothing like a person from London; there is no such thing as a “British accent”. Tell them instead that you like their accent, and don’t insult them by instantly letting on you know nothing about their country and culture.

2. “I can do the best British accent.”

This is a bad move for two reasons. As stated above, “British” accents don’t exist. For that very reason, your version probably isn’t very good—think Anne Hathaway in “One Day” when she somehow managed to mix a heavy Yorkshire accent with elocution-lesson English (appalling). Also, the novelty of hearing an American bark “tea and crummmpets!” at you like it’s the funniest thing you’ll ever hear tends not to be the funniest thing you’ll ever hear when you’ve heard it several times in one evening.

3. “Oh, you’re from London!”

Maybe your victim is in fact from London and you’re very good at guessing. But that would be like hearing you were from America and then immediately assuming you were from New York, when actually you hail from a backwater in North Dakota. Stick with “the U.K.”, “Britain” or, if you’ve really been doing your homework, “England”/”Scotland” (or whatever else you can discern—you’ll score several points for specific counties).

4. “Oh, you’re from Europe!”

The U.K. is not Europe. Well, OK, technically yes it is part of Europe—but it’s also not. Not to us. We’re pretty proud of our poky little island, and we don’t tend to lump ourselves in with mainland Europe. We’re British, thank you very much, not European.

5. “Cheers, mate!”

This is very closely linked to point No. 2. But “cheers, mate” is, without doubt, the most irksome. Why? Because every other person we meet will invariably drop it into conversation. And we cringe. Every. Single. Time. Just… don’t do it. Rise above.

6. “My great-grandmother was British!”

It’s not that this is annoying; it’s just kind of irrelevant. One thing I noticed in the U.S. was that you guys all seem to be very aware of your family tree; aside from being ‘Murican on the face of it, you know your roots, where your family come from, and you like talking about it. Now, much as I think this is fascinating, you must understand that in Britain we kind of don’t care about that sort of thing. Unless we are very closely descended from a family of immigrants, our cultural ties to our ancestors are generally non-existent. No offence, but I’m just not bothered if you have some British lineage somewhere down the line—unless it turns out you’re a secret descendent of the Tudor family or something, but that is unlikely.

7. “Ohmaigaaad I could listen to you talk all

Is there anything more awkward than having someone look at you with pure adoration and tell you they could listen to you forever? Not really. Our awkward British dispositions aren’t programmed to cope with the simplest of compliments, so direct and unwarranted declarations of love from strangers are just painfully cringe-inducing.

8. “Do you live in a castle?”

9.9999 times out of 10, the answer is no. Don’t bother.

9. “You drink in Britain? But you do it in a classy way, right?”

I have legitimately been asked this question, and although the girl who spoke these now infamous words is one of my best friends, I still cringe when I think about this. Here’s another nugget of cultural wisdom for you about the U.K.: we drink a lot. In fact, we are renowned around Europe for being disgusting, binge-drinking louts. Save yourself the embarrassment if you’re even curious about what British drinking habits are like. FYI: we go hard, we’re disgusting, and we drink a lot of hard cider. Not classy at all.

10. “What is a crumpet?”

The trouble here is, apart from the question becoming so repetitive, is that I just don’t know how to describe a crumpet. My befuddled on-the-spot answers have included ‘like some kind of bread with holes in it’ and ‘kind of like a pancake but really fat and holey’. Spare your British friend/crush/stranger from accurately describing the world’s most confusing carbohydrate, and do your research instead. And if you really want to impress them, make some yourself (recipe here), because crumpets are distressingly hard to come by in your average American supermarket.

*If you do happen upon royalty, I suppose number eight wouldn’t necessarily apply. Although I’d try and come up with a more interesting pick-up line if you’re thinking about becoming a member of the Windsor clan.

View Comments (127)
    • Quite frankly, the author needs to chill out. If she does not like what Americans say to her, she should say in her own repressed country where everyone frowns, complains and speaks nastily about ‘those Americans, oh but not you, you are different, you are one of the nice ones’. You can tell by the silly dislikes of this one how petty they are. People say those things to be friendly and make you feel welcome, not actually because they give a &*#% if you know they have a British grandma or if you are from London. You need to come here and figure out cool things to say to Americans so we can get a better view of you people.

      • So, don’t say anything at all to you that refers to you being British? Because, this is EXACTLY how your putting it, even though, you are, in fact, British. Being American myself, it’s very awkward for an American to just ignore the fact that the person we’re talking to comes from another country, and we will try our best to relate to them. With all do respect, I feel like your being neurotic (abnormally sensitive) about this subject.

  • Your comments are an interesting case study on the private/introvert British culture (home is castle, pull up the drawbridge) and the extravert American culture (Hiiiiiii….great to meet you). As a Canadian who spent 19 years in England, it was interesting to experience some of your examples in British “corollary” form, or in reverse. What is an “American accent”, for example? Georgia or Minnesota? I had lots of Brits try their American accent on me. It was usually the reverse image of Dick van Dyke trying to sound British in Mary Poppins. And, of course, most Brits thought I was American. Then there’s the “I have a cousin in (pick a city)” thing once they find you’re from Canada. I was once asked if I might know someone’s cousin from Victoria (I’m from a city 3000+ miles east of Victoria, and pointed out that I was born about half way between London and Victoria). One thing you don’t get in America is “how long are you over for?” (i.e. when are you leaving).

  • I have been told by an Englishman that a Canadian is an Englishman with a bad education; an American is a Canadian with a bad education, and an Australian is an American with a bad education. Is it what they really think ?

    • Ha, kind of funny, never heard it before though and I don’t think anyone thinks that. We do think Americans are stupid though, because half of them are. I don’t think most Brits know enough about Canada or Canadians to even pass any opinions. Not everyone travels or knows about the rest of the world. British education isn’t very good either. If you stopped 10 random people in the street and asked them to point at Canada, you would get at least a few laughable answers. Some people do a good job with the limited education they get, some people don’t.

      Also this blog doesn’t seem very accurate to me. It makes Brits sound so uptight which isn’t true of everyone. Or even a lot of people.
      1) When someone talks about British accents, most of us know what they mean. They mean the London accent because that is the most common one and the one that gets represented the most around the world. Maybe they know some northern accents too and like those too, either way, it’s nothing to be annoyed about.

      2) Imitation is a form of flattery. I don’t see a problem with Americans doing British accents. I’ve seen it a lot, in real life and on TV in shows like Friends. The only time I wouldn’t like it is if the person doing the imitation was being mean.

      3) The Oh you’re from London thing is pretty dumb. It wouldn’t annoy me because I know it wouldn’t be meant to be offensive, I just think it is a bit dumb.

      4) From Europe – yes, no, whatever, who cares? It is part of Europe technically so what’s the problem. We are out there on our own because we are an island and we are quite individualistic, but who cares if we get referred to as European? It’s just so general and meaningless anyway. Blogger is so uptight.

      5) Cheers Mate – I played a game online and an American helped me do a lot of stuff (it was a game where you have to work together) and I helped him with some stuff too. He used to say “cheers mate” to me over his microphone and I found it flattering. Flattering not only because he was calling me mate so considers me his friend, but also because he is trying to be endearing to me by showing me he knows about Britain and some of our culture. I don’t understand how anyone could be annoyed by this… It is a nice thing.

      6) Grandmother is British – Blogger just seems mean with this point, and rude. I AM interested in peoples heritage, how could you not be? And unless you are a native American, then they have all come from somewhere originally anyway. So why not hear about it? Just because they might have a relative that was from the same country as me, doesn’t mean they expect me to do anything for them or treat them any differently… They are only saying it because it is relevant and interesting. Again, blogger is uptight and nasty.

      7) “Could listen to you talk all day.” Flattering and sweet. If you see it any other way, there is something wrong with you, which is obviously true of this blogger.

      8) Live in a castle – nobody lives in a castle, I would just assume the person is dumb. I wouldn’t feel annoyed or anything, maybe just some pity.

      9) Classy Drinking – I have never heard this in my life and I lived in America for a year and have been there many times since. I think the blogger was just looking for something else to bitch about. Either way, we drink the same as Americans. Some are classy and have a nice wine with dinner or whatever, but plenty of people like to go out and get wasted.

      10) What’s a crumpet? – I don’t think crumpets are very popular in Britain, not sure where this stereotype comes from. Nobody I know has ever talked about crumpets and I’ve never seen anyone eat one. Except for my mum, she bought crumpets a few times for us as kids. I would say in the 20 years I lived at home, she bought them maybe 5 times. It means nothing to a Brit, it is just an alternative to toast. They are similar to bread, but doughy like it is uncooked or something. You toast it in the toaster or under the grill and it becomes a bit crispy on the outside but the inside remains doughy. I don’t really like them. But if you cover them in butter or jam they taste ok, but then so does anything.

      • Hate much? Sweetie, people like you and your thought and attitude and opinions are pure ignorance coming from you. We all can say the same about British people who honestly believe they are above everyone else and extremly snobby. We are not “Yanks”, we are Americans and no one, not even in your country, are perfect of any sorts. We are good, kind, caring, educated and loving people. Who love God and our country. It sad how you perceive us. First you insult Americans but you then liked that an American helped you on an online game. I actually met my nieces in-laws from ourside of London, they were with my in-laws during Christmas holiday. The question one of the cousins asked me questions about if I eat only spicy foods because I am Mexican-American…that means that I was born in America and my ancestors are from Spain and Mexico. She also asked me questions that made me laugh because it showed what her (or all the British must think of Americans). I wasn’t insulted but I just said no or explained what I like to eat. Or I do not speak Spanish because I am an American. So maybe it’s the media that still stereotypes all cultures. You say “most” Americans are stupid, you wouldn’t last if you said that out loud standing by yourself. People like you are ignorant, which means basically, you’re dumb.

    • No, were not, were not European. We are fiercely independent, a right we have earned due to being the ONLY European nation that has not been invaded and conquered in over 900 years. And, come the referendum in June, we will be even less European. Kay, thanks, bye.

  • Laughed so hard at the part about ancestry. It’s worse than you think though, it’s not just “Oh, my great grand aunt was British”, some people will even profess to be Irish or Italian or whatever even if their family has been in the country for 3 or 4 GENERATIONS. Hahahahaha. We’re very attached to the “melting pot” concept in the US.

    • Although, the thing is, people think it’s interesting. I’m from Canada, yes my Great Grandfather was British, coming from a part of the royal family, it seems very cool. Scientifically, everyone who has ever lived on this earth are 50th cousins, so really everyone is related, some just more closely like me.

  • we have a separate currency, there is a generally hostile opinion of the EU in the UK (hence why parties like UKIP get more votes in the European parliament than our own) we are a separate island from the rest of Europe, we have a separate culture, the British are as a whole more socially tolerant to other races, other nations in Europe see us as less ‘cultured’ and pretty much every Brit you come across will refer to themselves as British, calling the British European is the same as calling the Canadians or Brazilians american…, ,

    • This is the most ignorant comment ever, well probably not but it is ignorant.

      The UK is most certainly part of Europe. A country does not need to be on the Euro to be classified as being part of Europe. The French have a different culture than the Germans that have a different culture than the Swedes; all of which are still part of Europe, the continent. It would technically be incorrect to call a Canadian an American, one could call a Canadian a North American. America is not itself a continent; while Europe is. The same would be said for Brazilians except for South American instead of North American.

      Also, just because some in the UK are hostile to the EU does not mean they are not part of the EU or mean they are not part of Europe.

      • No, were not, were not European. We are fiercely independent, a right we have earned due to being the ONLY European nation that has not been invaded and conquered in over 900 years. And, come the referendum in June, we will be even less European. Kay, thanks.

  • It’s the same as saying going to the continent as a British person, followed up by saying you will only talk English. I am also not going to the Island and speak German/Dutch/French there. Seriously.

  • Really good post! The American accent does sound…strange, to say it softly, aside the English. But. Sing something. Truly. Anything… Go ahead. Sing now… you sound American!! :) We talk the way English people sing. God has a sense of humor! :)

    • Disagree. Most pop singers have used an american accent for years, but there’s a small minority who don’t (Morrissey is one) and none of our folk singers do. I think it just started from the 50s when anything American was considered better.

  • Hate to break it to you but Great Britain only refers to Englands, Scotland and Wales. The United Kingdom refers to England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales. Thats why its called United Kingdom Of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Check your passport.

    • Ok to make 1 thing straight.England IS a part of Europe.They ARE somewhat Europian .The writer HAS to chill out.What are you doing ? You can’t just offend Europeans Amy.. CHILL OUT DUDE ! I’m American but I have some family in Europe,they are nice & they are very offended by this.

  • And, not all Americans are from the United States. There are two American continents with many, many countries.

  • In the north of England and even Scotland, ‘Cheers mate’ is like thank you, so just ignore this opinionated southerner

  • Wow. Thanks for the article. Even after reading the article, I still love the accent, and the fact that my ancestors are from the northern part of Britain. You, however, come across as an arrogant little shit. Hopefully not all Brits are like you.

    • David, it’s nice to know that one arrogant English opinion has not clouded your judgement of us all :) Sadly, you’ll meet good and bad Brits around the union. Many English people would be perfectly happy to answer any American’s questions or listen to your opinions – after all, both our nations are intrinsically linked in history and culture. Be proud that your ancestors are from the North – we’re all much friendlier up here ;)

  • I sure hope the British are NOT european, i wouldn’t wish it to any european. but both suffer from he same problema and that’s why neither Europe or Britain will NEVER be relevant in the future.

  • I’m British and your giving me a bad name. You fucked up on question 1… Great Britain is just England lol not 4 different countries.

  • Who wrote this? A patronising gap year student?

    It’s a tad harsh all round. All of these examples sound like somebody trying to be nice by making conversation about your accent. I have some sympathy that people might ask you the same thing all the time and it gets a bit draining but the intent behind them is friendly. If the worst thing is people complimenting you on your accent then it sounds as though you could have done a lot worse.

    Also I identify myself as both British and European and I’m proud of both. To say the UK is not in Europe is plain wrong and to suggest we all think like that is ridiculous. Apologies but anything that vaguely sounds like something that Nigel Farage would say gets my rankles up.

    • “Who wrote this? A patronising gap year student?”

      Nailed it.

      What kind of editor would allow a piece this trite and condescending to actually be published?

  • Thank you for the helpful article. I admit I am the sort that does enjoy a wide range of UK accents. I think most Americans don’t know that the neutral American accent is actually closer to the original English accent than any of the modern British accents.

  • I’m an American living in the UK and honestly some of these are a bit strange to me. Calling it the British accent is the same as calling it the American accent. It is used as a blanket term to refer to the general British accent and not a willful ignorance. Rather it is a real ignorance as most American will not be able to pick out a Yorkshire accent from and London accent. Its not an insult to be unaware of the intricacies of the various accents in Britain and in fact it is correct to call it a British accent as the accent originates FROM BRITAIN. I would not expect you to be able to differentiate between various American regional accents nor would I be offended if you referred to my accent as American. I’ll concede the point about trying to replicate the accent however as most Americans are inept. “Cheers mate” is really an extension of my previous point if being used by Americans but it is in fact used frequently by Brits (I have ample personal experience with this). 3, 4, 8, 9, and 10 all come from simply being unworldly or uneducated and (despite the stereotypes of Americans being unworldly) exist amply in the UK as well as the US and the rest of Europe. We simply just have more people in the US and a larger fascination with recording idiots on camera. The American thing with drawing lineage is really just an extension of the prejudices that exist among European countries. Blame yourselves for our obsession with our lineage. As for number 7, well foreign accents are simply sexier than those we have grown up with our whole lives. It may go against British sensibilities to state our affections in this way but you are all are just as turned on by that sexy Spanish accent as the rest of us. So get off the high horse.

  • This is why I hate living in America. I wanna travel/live in England so bad yet there’s people over there like the one who wrote this blog and it makes me feel like they all look down on us, and they obviously do. I just wish I could come over and be like, ‘hey, I wanna be one of YOU’ but nope, I’m just a dumb ole ‘Murican to them.

  • So you don’t like your accent being generalized as British because there are at least 4 distinct countries within it but you don’t like being generalized as European because you’re British?! I just don’t get it. Don’t you think it’s annoying to Americans how everyone’s idea of the American accent is Valley girl and surfer boy? But I get it, if someone isn’t from here there is going to be generalizations and they aren’t going to know the differences found in all the states. Also I’d like to defend people who try identifying as British that you’re laughing at. I like America, but we are too young of a country and there is no true culture, history, richness, etc. to it. This is why most Asians will identify themselves as whatever country their parents were from even if they’ve been here for several generations and no one blinks an eye. Black people will try to connect with their African heritage even though they might have been here longer than most white people. There is a longing in this country for a heritage that everyone else has that we cannot get here. So what do we do? We find out where we were from before that because it has shaped our genetics even if we’ve been here 5 generations. I recently went to an authentic German restaurant and thought I wouldn’t like the food. Not only was it delicious, it settled perfectly and gave me that fully satisfied feeling. My Filipino bf thought it was ok, but it really upset his stomach and made him feel wrong. We joked about the fact that it’s because I’m German so my body is genetically predisposed to eating these kinds of foods and let’s face it there is probably some truth in it. What’s even worse is that a lot of people have your attitude of shutting us out when we try to appreciate where we came from which makes us feel even more isolated. I really want to learn about my heritage (which is some sort of British/European and German) but I’ve heard European and British people say some nasty things about Americans who try. Yet they still say nasty things when we don’t know enough about their country for being ignorant.

  • I think the writer of this article is a bit immature. It is apart of human culture to be curious and converse with others. If you don’t like the overfly friendliness of Americans stay in your own country.

  • I really liked your text, but a friend of mine just read it together with me just now and I feel I must write down what she just said. First: one saying ‘British accent’ it’s not completely wrong IF one is just talking in general (although it’s extremely vague). The reason why many Brits get angry at that is because people always assume one is from England and therefore the English accent is the ‘standard’ accent, just like it happens to Americans when someone immediately thinks they’re from New York or LA and so on (and you pointed that out yourself). So no, ‘British accent’ is not wrong as long as one means it in general terms.
    Second: The United Kingdom does belong to Europe, not only technically but also theoretically. Just because it’s detached from the physical land, it doesn’t mean it doesn’t belong to it. The otherwise it’s like saying ‘x’ island doesn’t belong to ‘y’ country because they’re detached. What you just wrote reminds me a little bit of some Scottish people (no offense to Scottish people because they rock!) who want to believe Scotland doesn’t belong to the United Kingdom when it actually does, whether they like it or not. The UK couldn’t be part of the European Union, but it will always be part of Europe, sorry about that if it bothers you.
    In other words, I understand some stuff become very tiring of hearing, but you (as well as many people out there) don’t have to ‘freak out’ about it to the point of becoming irrational or even ignorant.

  • lol! Im from the Philippines and Im not from Asia – lol! that doesnt make sense to me! my country is from Asian continent therefore I am from Asia (geographically speaking) and just because big population of Asia is from China and I hate China for claiming part of our country doesn’t mean that I have to detached our country from Asia and label myself as being from the Philippines not from Asia! its

    • Actually I get her point and Im filipino too. Since we are too different from the rest of the asians especially the japanese,koreans and chinese I feel awkward saying Im asian. I say Im filipino first before Im asian. Its like the UK since they are closer to the americans and australians the the rest of europe

      • The reason we Brits do not think of ourselves as Europeans is because we are fiercely independent, due to the fact that we are the only European nation that has no been invaded and conquered in over 900 years. We have earned the right to do things our own way, but the rest of Europe does not like that. Which is tough, to be honest.

      • hey guys!yeah @robzsarmy:disqus @robertshepard:disqus you are both right..totally right! Respect the opinion and truth about British people…Im from Philippines and I rather accept that I am a Filipino not asian lols! for those who are desperately insisted a wrong idea please! widen your tiny minds guys who are overrated bout Brets, they are not totally a european they are British yah’know? and thats is right because if you are aware sense of knowledge so your goin to understand what shes trying to say guys!

        ihope you guys out there got an idea about the Bexit lols!Well I can be proudly say that British people are gentleman and respectful, unlike other americans or aussie (disgusting)visiting philippines just to take a girl to be their wife but probably those are not the best woman of philippines, taking from the bars/manila or either rural areas which they can totally manipulate the pInay and used as a slightly slave lols…those girls who doesnt even know that these american or aussie are just ordinary people that commit a worst mistake though or just have a normal life.

        Doesnt mean your an american you are the best! lols..NOWADAYS americans are worst than before!all of you are liberated through out your soul & totally Racist lols..idont think you still asking help from God above..British people still has a sense of love & respect with regards to their family, Americans are normally for separation/divorce!isnt it worst than british culture? lols..think yah guys!

        just an opinion from a filipino..

    • Isn’t it kinda like calling a Canadian an American because they’re from the Americas (North America)?

  • I’ve lived in the US for 2 years now and am not annoyed by any of the above in the slightest. Maybe 2 years isn’t enough, or maybe I don’t meet enough annoying people (I work in academia). I’ll just mention one point:
    As an Englishman living in the US for nearly 2 years, I haven’t been at all offended by ‘I love the British accent’ – I see it as a compliment. A staggering 84% of British people are in fact English*, so it’s a fair assumption. It’s only really likely to offend someone Scottish or Welsh, but also highly likely that they’re saying ‘love the British accent’ to someone with an English accent anyway. I expect that people would specifically say ‘I love the Irish/Scottish accent!’ to those two. As for Welsh, well, they’ll probably be less aware of the accent and ask where it’s from, and perhaps they won’t ‘love’ it (I kid). *87% if you don’t include Northern Ireland, and it could be argued that you shouldn’t as ‘British’ refers to Britain – the island of England/Wales/Scotland – and not the UK, etc.

    • I think it’s more that to the average American, ‘British accent’=posh English. And nothing else. Anything else less immediately identifiable usually gets labelled as ‘Cockney.’

  • Maybe it’s just my opinion, but your arguments are very snobish, rude, ignorant and unvalid. I actually felt offended by your post.

  • I liked this article. I have gained a recent obsession of late with how we are perceived by non-british people and somehow came across this. Nodded and laughed more than once.
    The only thing I personally don’t agree with is point 4, but I recognise I am in a minority of brits on this one, and so the point is valid. I feel that, especially after the last 15 years, that we would be better off emphasising our connection to Europe. Let’s face it, we have deep historic and cultural ties with Europe. I do consider myself both British and European.
    But again, great article. Especially the bit about tea and crumpets, I have gotten that more times then I can count from US citizens.

  • Great Britain is in the U.K.. UK is not Britain. it’s not the same

    2nd Your little island belongs to Europe. Get over it. You are not a continent. You are European. Don’t be that girl.

    • No, were not, were not European. We are fiercely independent, a right we have earned due to being the ONLY European nation that has not been invaded and conquered in over 900 years. And, come the referendum in June, we will be even less European. Kay, thanks, bye.

      • Do you understand what “European” means? There are seven continents in this world and all countries must belong to one, including “Your little island”. And as far as I know your country is in the area of Europe. I’ve no intention of being rude, just wanted to clear up some things for ya.

        ” Cheers, mate. “

          • so.. question.. if you don’t consider yourself European, but youre in Europe… are you saying Alaskans aren’t American?

          • Tell us or better, enlight us all. Which continent is UK part of?
            I start guessing you british study another kind of geography. I can understand you feel to have big genitals cause you made tons of billions selling slaves during your country life so I could guess they teach bad.
            If you then mean politically speaking..we all know that UK suck the USA balls…

      • So fiercely independent you’re a member of the European Union, though not for much longer if you’re wise. And not been invaded? There are probably more foreigners in London than Brits. There are parts of your country true Brits dare not go for fear of some knife wielding jihadi. Trust me, you have been invaded and are nearly conquered. The fiercely independents seem to go for UKIP and are brutally mocked in the process.

  • It’s good to know coming from you because I myself know about UK and its culture. I don’t speak fluent English much because I am not used into it. You know, I came from Davao City, Philippines and we have to speak Visayan in our place and we really have to utilize our own tongue just to keep in touch with any sensitivities in our life. Pretty interesting topic coming from you. Keep up the good work! :-)

  • Or just stay over there and stop bitching about what Americans do. Our house our rules. That’s also an option.

  • All I have to say is British men are so strange when it comes to dating. I am a woman from the US semi involved with a British man, or so I think I am lol. He will go a short time without contacting me, only to pop up with a text like ” Hey beautiful, how are you? I wish you were here.” Oh well, he’s probably just playing me, right?

  • Honey I’m Italian n trust me we don’t really consider you European at all we don’t want rotted teeth idiots to even say there european n trust me a lot of Brits say oh were European like when it comes to getting naked easily or walk around topless your considered a European country but really your far from being a real European I’m Italian n French we don’t see you fools as European

  • I don’t know where you’ve been in the USA but where I’m from we don’t give a fuck if your British or from the UK whatever i can’t stand the British,Irish,n especially the Scottish accent to me there all horrible not to mention that geordie/new caste accent eww like kill yourself with that shitty accent your men are very feminine i have never said any of the things you claim Americans say to you i couldn’t give a shit where your from in the UK or your accent n what you eat n drink i find the whole country n the people annoying stay in the UK if you have so many issues with Americans we don’t want you here anyway

    • By “we”, he actually means “I”, but is too cowardly to take accountability for his PERSONAL aggressive, nasty opinion, and so hides behind “we” like a child cowering behind it’s Mother’s skirt.

  • Hahahaha ! You feel so proud being british! And because that we speak your language you feel that all the british population are queens and kings! Hahaha stupid people. Ofc i can say cheers and ofc i can say mate and also i can say fuck you all butter people. But can you say that in my language ? Ofc not! Ohh and the last one ofc you are not in the E.U you never been a member .and dont be stupid trying to tell me that you was a member .No! Being a member in the E.U meens a lot of thing and the first of all is to be love help and care for each other .your country is a piece of shit thinking that you are the best country in the world .I mean yeah you have a great history but also Greece had a great history and now is not feeling very well. Fuck you Fuck you Fuck you that my best english words :)

  • I am really happy that you and your Country all decided to leave us, the Europeans!!! Great Britain is waiting for you. Are you still there ?? Hurry up!

  • Frankly, you sound extremely stuck-up and I’m surprised anyone in America would want to be your friend after reading this. I’m actually appalled at the fact that you call yourself a Briton because the Briton’s I met, while studying in London act NOTHING like this. They enjoy being asked questions. They love to be complimented on their accents and they enjoy a good laugh over some of the stereotypes mentioned to them. Oh, and I can’t begin to mention how many times Briton’s tried to impersonate American accents once they learned I was from American. So perhaps, the next time you decide to post an article titled: “10 Things You Should Never Say To A British Person” it’d probably be wiser to title it: “10 Things You Should Never Say to ME” I think that would make for a much more honest depiction rather than include your fellow Britons who most would probably disagree with you. Cheers!

    • Don’t get too upset. Obviously, the writer of this article thought of a gripping Buzzfeed-esque title to her article, then had the task of filling it with ten points. They aren’t necessarily true points, they’re there for comical effect.

  • You came out from Oxford to say you are not European? Such ignorance goddamn. Uk IS IN EUROPE stick it in your head and if this annoys you go to another island like Madagascar or whatelse which is not in Europe. Uk left EUROPEAN UNION which is different.

  • I can remember quite well how these faggots made laugh of me cause years ago I couldn’t understand very well oral brit english while I was in Belgium. Truth said is that I’ve NEVER IN MY LIFE heard a british talk Italian without making BAD MISTAKES..even if a teacher. What I mean is..try talking and express in other languages…I can speak Italiano, Francais, Deutsch and English. And these brits? Oh…just that annoying-snobbish-accented english and what? oh..nothing else? stay in your island plz..I don’t wanna see you here spreading shit about Italians every other day and then I have to see here cause oh..damn your food is worse than shit…Really you are so fake-polite.

    • Reading this, your writing of British English is rather poor too. If you don’t mind, i’ll just address a few of these points, Eric. In all honesty, Brits won’t be too good at Italian (the few that bother to learn it) because, well.. for obvious reasons. Italian is not taught in England, most Brits learn French/Spanish/German. Meanwhile in Italy, English is a compulsory subject, and for good reason; many TV shows/Movies/Songs/Signage are all in English. I completely understand, Eric, that as a citizen of a nation sadly undergoing a mass decline (a sinking ship) you would be envious of those who live in much more prosperous nations, but racism and hatred is not the answer! As a Canadian whose been to Europe many times, the Italians are by far the rudest of the lot in my opinion (Generalisation).. and you, ironically, are an example of this.

  • I feel like the author wrote this article as a bit of satire, it’s not meant to be interpreted seriously. what’s more interesting to me is how it was received by various nationalities in the comments section.. really shows a lot. I understand why those.. more serious.. Americans may not like this article. But why are Italians getting involved? I didn’t realise there was such a hatred towards Brits in Italy.. probably down to jealousy due to the Italian economy going down the toilet. With such high youth unemployment, Italian millennials must have nothing better to do than produce poorly-worded racist comments on LD all-day.

  • Americans usually can’t distinguish between a Glasgow accent and a London accent any more than the author could distinguish a Mississippi accent from a Louisiana accent. To the American ear, people from Great Britain all sound alike.

    • Lydia,
      I would like to assist you in identifying the various accents that you might encounter should you ever visit the sceptered isle: Go to youtube and look up “Stanley Baxter”: “Parliamo Glaswegian”. Americans regularly ask me if I am Australian, no, just a regular Londoner.
      Mississippi from Lousiana; that is tough, however I do proudly claim to be able to recognize a Georgia accent from a New Jersey accent!

  • Sorry but I have to say this: you sounded so snob and full of yourself that you made me want to quit learning English for a moment. You should be happy that other people are excited about UK and want to know more about your language and your country. It’s natural they don’t distinguish accents, and that’s because they’re not English.
    What should I say about me? When people come to know that I’m from Italy, they start saying random words (buongiorno, arrivederci, spaghetti, pizza, pasta, mafia) with Super Mario’s accent. I just laugh, you should do the same. Try to be patient, and show them the right way to talk and behave.

  • This is the absolute most derogatory post; people were enthusiastic and complimenting you, and you were put off and had to go on a tangent. Americans have different accents as well and I highly doubt you could distinguish Texas from North Carolina or Boston from New York. You were homesick? Stay there.

  • this is written from the authors point of view only thing I do agree on is I love America and I love Americans more than anything else but this article is one sided

    • I wonder how the English view their Royals. I absolutely understand tradition but are you evolving to the point of recognizing blood lines should not dictate stature in society? Just in case, I will say, “No offense intended.”

      • I’m British.

        I view *my royals* as people I’m not very fussed about. They have no effect on my daily life, nor do I have an interest in them. They are nothing special.

  • This is not a nice post and it’s too stuck up. Americans are most welcome to accost me all day n night.
    UK *is* Europe (tho not a part of the european union project soon ;) ). Yes we do hav the best accents in the wurld (and the wurst) – and a rural oxfrd accent is *virtually* like a general american wun! And crumpit has another meaning which Amy neglected t tell you!…..

  • OMG….I can’t believe your colossal stupidity. My dearest friend is British. I sent this tripe to her. Her words “what an insipid dolt. She is an embarrassment to Brits”. She says “mate to her friends, sometimes others. She also makes her own crumpets. Ergo, make your dam crumpets. Get over yourself.

  • I am loving these comments. Whether the author intended this as humor or not, she missed on all counts. Even if she was kidding, she sounds rather snotty. I’m not offended when I go abroad and people assume that as a Texan, we all own oil wells, wear cowboy hats, fry everything, and live on farms or ranches. I dont mind if they mimic my accent or say they love it. I dont care if they ask me how to fix brisket, chicken friend steak, or anything else. It doesnt bother me if I live in San Antonio and they ask me if I know John Doe in Washington State. As Wade says, “grow a thicker skin”.

  • I would rather suggest that you stick to writing about orangutans. After moving to work in the sanctuary.

  • Not all British are discusting when it comes to drinking. A person cannot be expected to know all of the foods of a country so what was mentioned about a crumpet well for 1 its cos of the impression the upper stuck up class has given. Most British don’t care about the posh way of things that’s for the snobs.

    Cheers mate is something most of us British actually do? Used to say thank you, goodbye, or even toasting. So really someone ought to do their homework before writting this stuff. Unless of course its purely banter else its utter tosh. Why would anyone really be insulted if a person stated one of their relatives is/was orginally from the UK?

    No such thing as a British accent? HMM someone is really of their rocker to be honest. UK has many British accents sure enough but please tell me, which countries if any only has the one?

    I honestly do agree with people asking if your from London. YEP London is a region and 2 its thee smallest region in England. So defiently there is much more to England than just London.

  • English person here. Can I point out to any Americans or non-Brits that not all of us have a chip on our shoulder like the author seems to. I’ve had the pleasure of visiting the US and had no problem answering questions about where I’m from, or comments about my accent, etc. It’s called being friendly and curious. If friendly people bother the author so much, why does she not simply politely explain to them instead of posting a snooty ‘Don’t do this!’ list online. You don’t speak for me or the majority of British people. Americans, I love you and ask me whatever you like.

    • wow, this is so nice- thanks!
      i have a question that i haven’t been able to find the answer to anywhere online. why do british people say “right” a lot at the beginning of a sentence? i read books written by british people and i notice the characters do this a lot, as well as in TV

  • Well lady, I think you need to come down off your high horse before somebody (preferably American) knocks you off it. As a Canadian, we understand our American neighbours better than someone like you could ever hope to. They’re warm and friendly people who admire the history and culture of the UK. So what if Americans are enthusiastic about Brits and their various accents? You should take it as a compliment instead of slamming them for their admiration of your people. Get the hell over your damn self, you pretentious prig!

  • No worries Amy, I will NEVER say any of those things to you… Because it’s all too boring.

  • Damn, this is kind of harsh, especially since some of us may have been born in america but perhaps, like in my case, I was raised by my British grand mother, AND British great grandparents, so maybe fuck off? Lol

  • Amy, on point 4, it is completely correct. The UK is Europe, just like Pakistan is Asia, Perú is America and Morocco is Africa. It is not only technical, but profound fact. Maybe not to you (you claim ‘us, in which case who is us? Leave voters?), but to a few million people it is. When people say you’re from Europe, they don’t only mean continental Europe (you confuse both Europe and continental Europe). Iceland is in Europe, Zealand (Copenhagen Island) is in Europe, Sicily is in Europe. Yes, you are British, wave the flag, but you’re also European, and always will be, unless the UK will move to America or Africa or Asia or wherever.

    Fun fact: the UK will cease to be Terran once it leaves the Earth.

  • Maybe they weren’t asking about crumpets, but were rather inquiring as to why you are (acting like such?) an insular, hateful strumpet. Maybe, no?

  • Wow that whole ‘ the uk is not Europe’ is a bunch of arrogant shit. You english people consider yourselves better than any other people but to be honest i’ve never ever seen a nation worse than u guys. You are literally fuckin dumb… and stupid. You are not educated in a lot of things. I’m working as a waiter and a lot of times when u english morons want to split the bill in half you can’t even devide a freakin number by 2…. how pathetic is it… 1st grade math… ok maybe in your country it’s in 5th grade to give u time for some practice. You guys are complaining about EVERYTHING, whining, crying… ahh so annoying

  • When I traveled to London a did a little friendly trolling by always asking folk, “how are you?”. The look of dissonance was too funny. Like clearly an insane question but far too polite to justify reacting. The realization mid way through that it must be an Americanism and absolute relief that it’s never a serious question is very funny to me.

    I must insist British accents, plural, is correct in reflecting the islands diverse heritag. Many Americans have quite strong republican sympathies and not saying UK is intentional, FYI. Sorry I made it heavy.

  • One thing I never got, when you study language you emulate as accurately as possible the local dialect and slang and phrases. Someone said cheers mate to me, we talked for a bit longer and I said cheers mate back, and he said goodbye. What is up with that? I am trying to connect to the familiar (to you) dialect like I would if I was in a remote village in china or some other place. You said cheers mate, so I said it back because it seemed appropriate.

  • Please ignore this stupid woman. We ARE European, and it sounds so bloody stuck up when she talks about being ‘proud of our island’. I went to America for an exchange programme, and I honestly found it fun when people did their best english accent or complimented my accent. And for the record, we do say cheers mate. Its just how you say thank you. So, Americans: please do not take ANY of this article seriously.

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