As a girl with thick hair (who sheds a lot) I feel this in my soul. From all the “Hey is this your hair?” snaps, to the time I had rainbow hair and thought a unicorn with mange was living in my apartment, to that truly wonderful evening I cooked a grown up dinner only to pull hair out of every course. I’m living life on the edge of having a Britney meltdown and shaving my head. If you’re a girl (or guy) who sheds a lot, these are some daily struggles you’ll probably relate to.
1. Brushing your hair and practically being able to make a wig from what you collect out of your hairbrush.
2. Sweeping up furballs of your own hair every two days. Who needs a pet?
3. Cooking is a mess. Unless you want to invest in one of those delightful lunch lady caps, prepare to pull hair out of everything you try to make.
4. Making out can be tricky—make sure both you and your partner are prepared to spend the next few hours pulling hair out of your mouths.
5. Finding those random super long hairs that make you question if there’s actually a witch hiding in your house.
6. Lint rollers are a must if you want to make it out of the door without looking like Cousin It.
7. Those super annoying hairs you can never find but are there all day, attached to something, tickling you.
8. When you wash your hair and all the stray hairs collect at the top of your ass. Why??
8 Trying to unclog the shower drain.
9. Finding hair in your ass crack and wondering how long it’s been there for.
10. 80 percent of cleaning is just gathering up all of your stray hairs from around the house, staring at the small creature you’ve created with wonder and marveling at how you have any hair left on your head.
11. Your partner complaining about finding your hair in their clothes, belongings, body crevices, etc.
12. That awkward stray hair that dangles off the seat of your pants all day until some kind soul finally points it out to you.
You can also check some of the tips Hair Guard has on making sure your hair always looks perfect.
This is so funny! My ex used to call it ‘marking my territory’ because there is always a stray laying somewhere.
May I add my own point? I suspect they’ll sound familiar.
13. Spotting a stray hair on your shirt while you’re eating at a restaurant, bar or someone else’s house and going through a series of progressively more awkward phases:
– wondering if it’s socially acceptable to pick it and drop it on the floor
– wondering what the heck should you do with it instead
– wondering why bon-ton manuals never explain what to do in this scenario
– discreetly trying to move it where it can’t fall into your food
– hoping the others won’t notice and be disgusted
– losing your appetite because of the thought of hair in your food.
Possible outcomes:
– the hair falls on the table/in your plate or cup
– the hair falls on the napkin you keep on your lap, like Mum taught you, and the ordeal restarts
– you finally have enough and head for the toilet to properly dispose of the sucker. Then you march back to the table feeling like a winner and… oh look, there’s another hair.